Loneliness sucks, and we all have felt it at some point in our life.

It is a feeling which makes us think that no one understands what I am going through and a feeling that I am alone in this world. It is the mental state of considering yourself as unwanted, unloved, or unconnected.

Although a prolonged feeling of loneliness is a psychological problem, it is something we bring upon ourselves.

Solitude, on the other hand, is a similar situation, but your mind is in a constructive, positive state, and you enjoy your own company.

As Tom Hardy said, “Being alone for a while is dangerous. It’s addicting. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don’t want to deal with people anymore.”

So, how can you stop feeling deprived of love and care, and replace it with a feeling of self-reflection and replenishment of your mind? Let’s find out.

Accept and embrace loneliness

The primary step towards getting rid of loneliness is to recognize and accept it. For most people, this part is the hardest because it’s challenging to face. You should not be ashamed of admitting that you’re lonely. You ain’t doing drugs or getting drunk in public; moreover, you are accepting it to no one but yourself. You can go on and on explaining loneliness, but admitting it is the initial step.

Learn to enjoy your company

Now, understand that loneliness is not a problem or weakness that needs to be treated; it is just a state of mind, and its perspective needs to be shifted. The difference between loneliness and solitude is the state of mind – in loneliness, you hate being lonely (negative), and in solitude, you enjoy spending time with yourself (positive).

When you start loving yourself enough that you give some time to yourself to learn, grow, and self-reflect, you’re making a choice to be alone and not to be left alone.

One of the best solutions to make this paradigm shift from negative to a positive mindset is meditation. It enables you to uncloud your judgments, control your thoughts, and laugh at and with yourself. Don’t know how to leverage meditation to embrace loneliness and achieve a serene state of mind? The Mind Game can help (stay tuned till the end for a little surprise).

Try connecting with people (naturally)

Have you ever realized why you struggle with loneliness? It is most likely that you find it difficult to relate emotionally and intellectually with most people. Simply put, the lack of connection we feel with other individuals is the root of loneliness.

Good news, this is also a choice we make every second of the day we refine our thoughts.

List down three people you are closest to, and you’ll realize that you’ll relate to them – emotionally, intellectually, habitually, and more.

Instead of being resistant to people’s thoughts and changing your mindset, try being more flexible in terms of what your mind can receive and project. You don’t need to force connections on yourself, but it’s recommended to be more open to different perceptions and opinions.

Find a tribe that shares your interests

Regardless of your interests and locations, you will always find a bunch of people you’ll be able to connect to, thanks to the internet and social media. For instance, if you love singing, you can join a music group on Facebook, and share all you’ve got. Finding a tribe is easy. Envision what kind of people would make a perfect group for you, and figure out a way to fit in that tribe.

Confront your deepest fears

Although the feeling of being left alone and separation is an illusion, your ego might resist you from believing it. Even when you’re aware that this self-created feeling of loneliness is the sole cause of your pain, you somehow end up turning it over again and again.

The feeling of separation and the vulnerability it accords makes up for the absolute sense of loneliness. Everyone carries these emotions, ready to be triggered. That’s why going on a holiday with your friends’ charges you up so much and having a fight with them brings up fear and grief.

Once you take in how vast this universe is and how accidental your existence is, and it is so imminent that one day you’ll die leaving everything on this planet, all such moments will start to feel more basic. All in all, when you start embracing the real truth and get rid of the illusions, loneliness becomes less scary and more enjoyable.

Final thoughts

Summing it up, loneliness and solitude are two poles of a magnet; your emotions are small pieces of iron. They get attracted to the pole you guide towards them.

Was this information helpful? Would you like to explore more dimensions of a human mind and emotions, and how you can master them to lead a better life? Check out The Mind Game currently available on Amazon India and Google Books.